Tuesday, December 24, 2002

I want Christmas badly!

I'm supposed to get up to go shopping in less than four hours. Don't see that happening.

And yet it probably will anyway.

I want Christmas! I want new books, and candy! Hell, I'm a fat nerd. But anyway, I want new pens, and cds, and magazine subscriptions, and surprises!

Christmas! I want things, by God! Give me things! I want stuff!

Really, while I do sort of want Christmas because of my bottomless greed, I also just sort of want it over with. People everywhere, emotions running wild bloody constantly, the need to leave the house more than once a week, it's all rotten. Every last bit of it.

But anyway, since it's almost Christmas, I thought it might be a good idea to detail my traditions. Everybody has Christmas traditions after all.

Christmas, of course, starts Christmas Eve. On account of my mother working third shift, Christmas Eve for me sort of starts when she goes to work. And then I turn on the Vatican. Why do I watch the Pope? I couldn't tell you; I'm not Catholic. I guess because it's what's on. And besides, some holidays only Catholics do right. And this Pope rules, but I've said all that before. I spend hours watching the Pope. Then, when the Vatican goes off, I watch the History channel. They usually have documentaries on the Apostle Paul or Jesus' family, etc. Then I write long emails to the folks I care about, and yet, never seem to write quite often enough. Sometimes I watch Mass on television after that; sometimes I go to sleep. In any case, soon after, my mom comes home, and my brother and his wife, and my father come over.

We open presents. I demand we do this first. There's much weeping and gnashing of teeth if anyone suggests otherwise. Afterwards we have Christmas breakfast, which is awesome. There's bacon and eggs for those so inclined, and French Toast for those who are more like me. And after that, there's playing with the stuff we got for Christmas, and cleaning up the paper.

What follows is a long period of napping and recovering from Christmas breakfast. Occasionally, there's intermittent periods of either going to visit relatives, or being visited by relatives. Napping is just the constant. Ahh, there's also my brother insisting on installing or setting up everything we got right then. It never works right away, and he's always frustrated, and it's brilliant really.

And then we eat Christmas dinner, which, after Christmas breakfast isn't as impressive. But hey, there's deviled eggs and pie, and who can complain? Then usually, one of my friends wants to do something and we go. One year, Angela and I saw a movie; perhaps we've done this two years, actually. Then another year, my dad and brother and I all went to see Lord of the Rings. And another year, I seem to remember playing 007 with somebody.

In any case, after a good time is had by all, it's back home and leftovers, and playing with the new stuff more and sleeping. It's quite nice when there's no theatrics. There's always theatrics though. Which is probably why I prefer my quiet Christmas Eves to my hectic Christmas Days.