Wednesday, November 19, 2003

I hate these days when time seems to fly by so quickly. I can't seem to catch up to myself. There's always more to do, and I don't want any of it.

Christmas break will come and make things better. At least, I hope so.

I guess I'm having what can only be described as "Senioritis." I don't know how those folks who seem to stay at university permanently can handle being here so long. Though I'm terrified of whatever it is that's after this, I sure as hell can't wait to be out of here. The academic world is irrelevance and minutae.

Mercifully, I seem to be getting a lot of school off. Teachers who never skip class are skipping. But, to return to reality, I have a German exam tomorrow that I'm utterly unprepared for in every way. On the one hand, I don't care. I really don't. I'd just as soon fail it and forget it. On the other, when I look back at other times I didn't care and screwed up tests, the next quarter I'm asking myself: "You couldn't have studied just a little and done better? Come, now." I know I'll be disappointed with myself if I can't discipline myself now. The question is whether or not that's impetus enough to actually make me work. At the moment, I'm doubting it.

My damn dad wouldn't take my cell phone with him today, so I don't know how my grandfather is. My sister's okay though, and home and all that. I'd rather be there than here, and I hate hospitals more than anywhere.